26.1.11

angels everywhere



On Sunday morning, in the damp chilly Brompton Cemetery, shooting an idea for our conceptual art, I passed this statue. Someone had placed the flower there. I have no idea who, or why.

Today, I've heard back from Roz's mum regards our ElleGate story, and she feels, as I do, that it's time to let it go. Let 'them' win. I'll go into details another time - the story is too stupid and too unpleasant to even try to explain - but as she said "I can think of many examples from past personal experience where bitter anger over injustice has led not to the injustice being redressed, but to shattering of peace of mind."



Or, as my wonderful friend Karin Robinson said:

"When something like this happens, it's so easy to get distracted from what we love to thinking about fixing the things we hate. Sometimes that's important and right. But equally often, we risk losing sight of why we are doing what we love in the first place.

That's what's important. And, forgive me if this sounds corny, but I think that in any battle between the passionate person who is doing what they love in a creative and inspiring way, and someone who steals from others, trying to gain undeserved fame, the creative person wins because THEY GOT TO DO THE WORK. Nothing the thief can do will ever really make the work theirs."



My father taught me that in any situation that causes pain or conflict in our lives - any at all - there is always, always, something positive that we can glean from it. Some learning experience.

I had wanted to win this, not for the money (it was such an insignificant amount anyway - Carmen's editor, Sibila, had asked ME how much I wanted to go away, it wasn't like we were suing them) but to try to set a precedent. I wanted to be the big strong older sister to help all you youngsters out there so when it happened with you, you could site Adams vs. Elle. I wanted to fight this stupid war with a large and powerful corporation so that you wouldn't have to. But it was really starting to seep into my brain and make me angry: I haven't had the stomach to take a single streetstyle shot of a stranger since this started, because I couldn't guarantee that their image would be safe. So Carmen B, and her boss Sibila, won in a sense, because they filled my head with all that bad stuff, and stopped me from doing what I had once loved to do.



But here's what's come from this experience: the force of support, the genuine passion, that I've received from each of you has at times moved me to tears. Our friendship (my husband and mine) with Roz and her family have grown. And most importantly, an angel appeared in my life in the form of Lucia Rubio, a young lawyer who lives and works in Madrid, who has studied French in London, and who has given so much time, and worked so hard, refusing payment, just because she felt a strong sense of right and wrong.

I now have a new friend: Lucia, and that's all thanks to Elle.es. And in the end: no one died. What they took was a copy of a few images, a few pixels of light and dark on a computer screen, and besides, living well is the best revenge.

18 comments:

thingsandstuff said...

Living well is indeed the best form of revenge :) Am really happy that you've reached some kind of ending to all this, it sounds as if it's been really hard and upsetting. The amazing thing is how in the worst times you find the best people...Lucia sounds pretty damn cool, as do Roz and her family.
Here's to sticking it to the man, perhaps not in the way you'd have originally liked but by living well....and as a big believer in karma I'm sure they'll get bitten on the ass one of these days :)
Jules xx

Fashion Limbo said...

Olé Lucia por luchar por el talento y la creatividad infinitas de Jill.

It's been a tough story to follow, but all I can tell you is you have done MAJESTICALLY well. And what's better, YOU KNOW.

You know you are the one with the gift of your art,
you know you are the talented one,
you know you are good at what you do,

All of that and more is something that Spanish Elle and their blogger will never be able to do. Not in their wildest dreams.

They are thieves and petty, sad beings. You are so much more and you have proven it by writing this inspiring post. And also, by this same post, you have become that "big strong older sister". We all admire you for your talent and the way in which you have dealt with this matter.

Exotic Beauty Maven said...

Jill, I am still so sorry that you (and Roz and her family) had to go through all this. I know that you really tried to hang in there for the rest of us, to protect US, but you also have to protect yourself and your sanity. If your heart is telling you to let it go and move on, I am glad that is what you have done.

In a strange way, I will always be thankful for "ELLEgate" because it is what really introduced me to you and your blog, as well as to Roz, whom I am just starting to follow. I may not always be visible, but I am there, lurking :)

It is so unfortunate that you had to go through this, but I think, unfortunately, yours was just one example of the many infringements that take place every day. The Coveted is going through it right now with a case of (what I see as) trademark infringement. Your experience has taught us two valuable lessons:

1. Fight when you feel you have been wronged.
2. Let it go when your heart tells you that is the right thing to do.

XOXO

Beautifully Invisible said...

Oops, that last comment was supposed to be from me! Old account signed into accidentally. Can you delete it please? :)

Jill, I am still so sorry that you (and Roz and her family) had to go through all this. I know that you really tried to hang in there for the rest of us, to protect US, but you also have to protect yourself and your sanity. If your heart is telling you to let it go and move on, I am glad that is what you have done.

In a strange way, I will always be thankful for "ELLEgate" because it is what really introduced me to you and your blog, as well as to Roz, whom I am just starting to follow. I may not always be visible, but I am there, lurking :)

It is so unfortunate that you had to go through this, but I think, unfortunately, yours was just one example of the many infringements that take place every day. The Coveted is going through it right now with a case of (what I see as) trademark infringement. Your experience has taught us two valuable lessons:

1. Fight when you feel you have been wronged.
2. Let it go when your heart tells you that is the right thing to do.

XOXO

Miki's scrapbook said...

I'm sorry you had to go through whatever unpleasant experience this woman got you into. Mean people always end up alone eventually and what's probably worse, I suppose they must reach a point during the course of their lives where they realize all the wrong they've done and can't even stand themselves anymore. More than likely this happens when their lives go downhill or when they are about to die.

I love Karin and your dad's wise words! :)

Hug!

Miki.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the lovely words! It's been a pleasure having been able to help you with this Jill :)

Lucía x

Kazuko said...

congrats to your decision - meaning: they might have "won" the battle (whatever that means), but they didn't break you, which is the most important thing. and believe me - what goes around comes around, anyway.

Hannah said...

Gorgeous photos, I've never been to Brompton Cemetry but people always tell me it's a fascinating place to walk around. I'm going to be a massive nerd and say the Angels remind me of the ones in Dr Who!!!


Hannah xx

San said...

Peace of mind is important and I'm sure that you and Roz family have made the right decision for you. Thanks for fighting for all of us.

What goes around comes around. I believe in that.

Enjoy the new year with all the beautiful people around you and the things you love to do.

Beautiful pictures as always.

Cheers, San

Looking Fab in your forties said...

Out of something bad has come some good, you have made a wonderful new friend who was prepared to take this on for you and you have grown closer to an existing friend. You are the bigger person in all of this and it is a wonderful post containing some very wise words. Sleep easy and do what you love doing best, you are not the one at fault here, don't let them stop you xxxx

A~MAKEUP~TALE said...

Even if you've laid the matter to rest, keep telling the story so that people are aware that this goes on. And it is unacceptable!

Style Odyssey said...

One word (to sum up what San and Kazuko said in their comments): Karma.

Thank you, Jill, for being the voice of justice. xoxo

P.S. You did win. Remember that.

Bea said...

I started following you round about when the whole elle situation started and I am still totally appalled, I'm so sorry you had to go through that! Well done for realising it would be healthier to give up though, I think you've handled it really well. You've also made so many other people aware of what they did which can only be a bad thing for them! well done for really and truly taking the moral high ground, at least you know that something good has come out of it. you've got a very avid reader in me, I so admire how you've dealt with it!
Bea xx
ps. also-karma's a bitch. it'll catch up with them one day.

Blythe and Charlotte said...

Jill, you are most definitely my blogging big sister. You are so wise and helpful! Blythe and I really look up to you, and we just keep being more and more impressed with how you've handled this.

Best wishes,
-Charlotte

Roz said...

Jill, I am glad that this whole nasty situation has improved our friendship, and I think your friend spoke great wisdom - no-one else can take your creativity away from you. I am sorry that you had to go through this, but I think you have approached the end with great wisdom.
Beautiful pictures of the angels here. I agree with some other commenters, I immediately thought of Doctor Who when I saw them! Funnily enough, my next post (in which I will also write about Elle, seems to work nicely in tandem with these photos you've taken!
Plus, did you hear that Hachette Filipacchi, the owner of Elle, is being sold?

Anonymous said...

A flower is definitely an improvement on a sock. http://www.flickr.com/photos/katyjd/4824562229/

Katy

polka dot said...

Ha, Katy, that's great! Check it out - it's also Brompton Cemetery.

So grateful to you all. Yeah, karma's a bitch. ; )

polka dot said...

p.s. Roz (and anyone else interested) - some interesting further reading:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2011/jan/24/magazines-free-media-launches

http://nymag.com/daily/fashion/2011/01/hearst_confirms_theyre_plannin.html

This could explain why Elle couldn't afford to pay the settlement which they had originally offered as compensation - and had asked us to choose a figure. Oh well, hey, that's life. It just feels so good to move on.