high maintenance

Passing comments from unrelated friends in the past 24 hours has me wondering if perhaps I'm a freak.

One friend - not remotely high maintenance, as a human being I mean, mentioned she was getting her hair done. The other was facebook private messaging me, from Miami, while getting a mani and pedi. 

And a third friend was on her way to her salon to get a blow dry. 

I'm wondering if perhaps I'm not normal.

For starts: I do my own nails. I've ever had a pedicure, and my toes are pretty good, I guess. I've been doing them hot pink for like a year now. My nails, I change all the time, but I also do those on my own. One hand paints the other, so to speak. And not only do I blow dry my own hair, but half the time, I just let it dry naturally. In fact I haven't spent any money on my hair, apart from purchasing shampoo or conditioner (I SWEAR by conditioner, preferably Aussie 3 minute miracle, which I'm known to leave on between swims, for hours at a time). I cut my own hair with a scissor. Now mind you: I"m not saying this is a trick you should try at home, nor am I saying I'm doing a good job. I remember though that Jerry Hall - while being married to Mick - not only cut her own hair, but conditioned it - and her entire body - with olive oil.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, I just don't get it about any of this. I don't understand the concept of a 'spa'. If someone, say, gifted me with a day pass at a spa, all I'd want to know is, does it have a pool/sauna/steambath, and if so, I'd bring my conditioner (see above) to compensate for the chlorine - or hopefully, they'd use that new salt based water, which is heaven - and I'd swim and swim and rest in the sauna til I was too hot and about to faint - as I did today - and swim some more. Then shampoo, conditioner, and hit the road, Jack.

But please don't come at me with beauty treatments, thank you very much. I don't like the idea of people I don't know poking and prodding me. Or pulling my hair.

Which leads me to the question: what is your idea of being pampered?

And that leads me to think of the idea of being high, or low, maintenance. I know this is just one superficial example. And the model shown here - backstage at London Fashion Week - I'm sure she can, and does, her own hair. This is work. This wasn't remotely relaxing, not in the context that I shot it. In fact the poor girl looked like she was being attacked. Which she handled with cool aplomb.

I'm just really thinking in terms of the concept of being high maintenance. I have friends who are single, and friends who are married or living with someone, and the difference has nothing to do with the texture of their hair. To a man, it seems to me that what men look for in women is are they high, or low, maintenance. Which leads me to the question: just who, exactly, are we doing all this for?


Jessie in Fashion Limbo said...

A few weeks ago I saw a great documentary by Chris Rock on black hair, and how "high maintenance" some african american women are in terms of their hair. The Men's reactions to all of this are brilliant and eye-opening.

I do my nails myself, never used to botherm but then my little sister got me into all this posh manicure thing, but DIY, so I've never been to a professional. I do it for me. With a boyfriend I did it, without one I still did, for me. Same about my hair. I hardly go to the stylists, I'm scared of them LOL. But whatever I do to my hair it really is for me. I don't care for men who want to touch my hair and feel it soft, or see it shiny, is about me, and it's great. I also cut my own fringe and that is a habit i wished I stopped as I have done such a bad job at times...

daisychain said...

I have a total lack of words right now but just cannot skip a post of yours xx

Veshoevius said...

So relate to this post - a trip to the hairdresse is like a trip to the dentist for me - I've rarely met one that can deal with naturally curly hair without inflicting a great deal of pulling, tugging and pain. I get a facial once a year as a christmas present and I might paint my nails once a year and probably only if it is a big occasion. When I see how often other women go and get their hair done or their nails painted I do feel like maybe I'm not making enough of an effort. I do like a facial though - that does make me feel pampered, as does someone doing my make-up for me.

ODYSSEY said...

My idea of being pampered is getting a massage and spending the day at the spa/pool/sauna/beach with friends. Lunch, champagne, all that. We used to do that, my friends and I, back in the BVI.

I reckon we mainly do these things for ourselves.

I am impatient and do not usually enjoy having my nails "done". I do like the results but I rarely get a professional manicure or pedicure anymore. For one thing, I've yet to find anyone here who does as nice a job as what I routinely had in the BVI. (No, I do not want long toe nails, and no, I do not want silly designs painted on - that is all the rage here.) And I can't find that spa atmosphere here. All I've found locally are high-turnaround places that smell of chemicals/artificial nails, and have those creepy mechanical "massage" chairs.

As for makeup, I've always been suspicious of having someone apply makeup to my face; it never looks right to me. Too heavy. No thanks!

Great post.

jill said...

These are fascinating responses - thank you for taking the time to give such thoughtful replies. What's especially interesting to me is that each of you.. what can I say. This just confirms why each of your friendships are so important to me. And to think we've all found each other through our blogs!